Mental Examination Rape

I don’t think this University thing is fuh me nah :/

Imagine I started this blog  like 3 days ago and I’m only now finishing it, on what I call a mild break from studying at the library because I’m waiting on someone to bring me my calculator. Ain’t no way I’m calculating this binomial probability distribution equation by hand, you cray? Lol. I hate exams.

Exams begin tomorrow, Thursday and within 7 days I’m done, actually, exactly 7 days. That’s great and all, except now my exams are jammed up, which I hate, but also sort of like because then I am forced to study and not in any way skylark(slack off if you didn’t know what that word means, lol) although I still do it regardless, but meaningfully and to a little extent.

I hate exams. 

I have yet to actually really study for tomorrow’s own and I’m trying not to freak out about the three I have next week God willing. I mean, midterms JUST FINISHED. Ok, not really, October it finished, well, sorta, with the exception of those 2 most hated courses(Statistics and Financial Accounting) on the first day in November, but still. It feels like just now, and BAM finals. Two exams in one semester, 12 weeks, is just NOT COOL. ANDDD on top of that, to have projects, heckloads of projects and presentations worth like 4 percent, FOUR PERCENT -___________- 4 online quizzes worth 1 percent each? what's the probability of me gettin the 1percent given my studying habits? Ok, well using the conditional probability approach we solve for P(A|B) which is equal to P(A) x P(B|A) :| my words Statistics is taking me over :| 

Ok back on track here, lol. See,  during CAPE we had two years to learn a few books ya know, for 5 subjects yes, but everything was year long. Here? You have to learn the entire 400 page textbook and understand it, for all of your courses. *Am I still alive?* Currently I’m on page 213 in my statistics textbook and the book is over 600 pages long. *Prays for Divine Intervention for my exam*  I really hope that the exam comes doable, then again Imma just be glad once it’s over. Thankfully, your GPA in your first year doesn’t count towards the GPA for your final degree. First year, is basically just a foundation, because most everyone in my faculty is doing the same 10 courses till we streamline according to our degree n the second year.

I feel like I’m writing a letter to a pen pal, letting them know how University is going. Weird. Lol

Next Semester, God willing. I NEED to deal with this UWI thing better. I started off and fluctuated really good. I would spend hours in the library. I’ve seen the library over 30 times probably, which is more than I can say for people who’ve seen it once in the three years they’ve been at UWI(You know yourself *evil grin*) And I pray next semester I get better group members, ahh group projects are the absolute WORST.  But I’m not gonna ramble on about that right now. I hate exams.

Where is this chick with my calculator? Blech, back to reading.

Tomorrow. Sigh* lol Time to go prepare for the start of what I like to call 'Mental Examination Rape' :| 

 So till next time, hopefully exams don’t kill me by the time of my next blog. DId I mention I hate exams? ok, just checking :| 

That is all [Exeunt] 

Gym-ing it! Habit 2

So, just as a recap of last week's attempt at building a early to bed early rise study/sleep habit. [See challenge here: http://everydemonwantshispoundofflesh.blogspot.com/2012/10/early-to-bed-early-to-rise-habit-1.html ] It failed *facepalm* It was successful relatively for the first 2 days, then after that it was back to sleeping late, but that is primarily because I got home late and I was dealing with a bit of confusion with regards to school, anddddd then because on weekends I study better at night when everyone is asleep, so yea, fail :/ lol 

So I paid for gym membership since the first or second day of school (aren't I the proactive student? not). I never went. lol That was due to a complication with my track membership and also a lottttt to do with my laziness. But this week, is gym week! And, well, every week, I guess. But the point is, for me to start somewhere, so I shall. So for this week, my goal is to spend a minimum of 3 hours in the gym at school. 

We'll see how that goes, and, well I'm going to TRY the early to bed early rise thing again. Hopefully this time I don't fail as horribly as last week. But heyyy, there's a reason they call this a challenge! >.< but I'll get there :D 

Takes about 21 days right? to make something a habit? darn it! Tough. Ah well, lol 
So, I'll keep you guys informed on this one. And oooo,I thought of doing a vlog challenge, consecutive vlogging for a set amount of days, because I planned to make a video like 6 weeks ago and I haven't yet. Fail. lol I'll think about it. 
So, till next time. Have a great week yall :D 

Ooooo, just thought I'd leave yall with this song, an absolute favourite of mine. Let it be some encouragement for yall :) 

Early to Bed, Early to Rise. Habit 1

So, during CAPE exams, I had this week where exams were literally back to back for an entire week. History Monday, Geography Tuesday, Spanish Wednesday, History Thursday, Geography on Friday, ugh, it was hectic. I hated it, I had to cope somehow, so for that entire week, I studied literally ALL NIGHT ALL MORNING, took a nap, studied then went to my exam. Come home, then sleep for like 4 hours and repeat. Needless to say i was hella stressed out that week, but at least my brain absorbed a bit more that way, sort of, lol

So yes, point is, my mind works better when it's fresh, and after school all day, I tend to come home and not be able to settle and focus...jointly because I'm tired, it's very hot, I have too many distractions like the internet, my parents want me to do stuff, it's noisy because everyone's active watching television and so I can't focus. I really need to focus, university life sucks. So I decided for my first habit, I would go to bed between 8-9, 9:30 for the latest, and 10 on days when I'm home extra late. and get up between 3-4 to study and do other activities. 

So last night, I went to bed at 9:30 and got up at 4 after the work of about 5 alarms :| lol xD And lemme just say it is awesome! I felt like I literally had more time in my day to do anything and everything I wanted. On normal days I go to bed whenever I feel sleepy, which is usually no time before 1, then get up late and rush to go to school, so I never get to eat breakfast. 
WELLL BLOWWWW MEEEE DOWNNNNNN, 'cause guess what, today I had time to slice bread, heat bread, butter bread, cut rotisserie chicken, heat rotisserie chicken, eat bread with my chicken, AND sit down and drink a cup of tea! FIRST TIME IN LIKE, OH MY GOODNESS, YEARS MAYBE! lol Never did that in secondary school 'cause I got boxlunch (now I don't and I'm very sad) :( 

And in addition to that, I had time to do a little chores, I made up my bed, yes that was a major task 'cause I was sharing with a lot of stuff, lol xD folded and put away plenty clothes. Plus I had time to comb a lot of my hair in twists, and all of this was done before 6:30am! Imagine that. I wouldn't have gotten any time to do that after school, because by then I'd be twisting myself around trying to settle, and I wouldn't! So It felt good :) 

ANDDDDDD it was also so coooooool! I love being up early, because it's quiet, I have time to myself, I have quiet to myself, quiet to sit and pray, quiet to watch the sunrise, see the sky change from it's dark deep blue to a bright one, hear the birds as they wake up ^_^ Talking about birds, the other night I happened to notice two keskidees in one of our trees, I never saw them before, but I always wondered why the tree used to shake gently at night. Till I somehow startled one and it flew out then i watch where it landed. And after that I saw the other one, completeyyyyy camoflauged! it was amazing, to me at least, and now I check to see if they're there every night and they are ^_^ So before 6am I went to see if they were still asleep, and nopeee they were already fluttering about. See even birds see the importance and urgency in waking up early. Early bird catches the worm right? So true. 

So, lots of habits started today. 
1. Getting up early to study and do other stuff
2. Drinking tea and having breakfast
3. Doing some sort of chore for a few minutes
and for these, I feel accomplished. I think this is the start of a great habit ^_^ One that will help me in future endeavours. I'm typing this blog from work at 3:30 pm, and I'm not even tired, I didn't come to school tired either, and I was more alert. 
OOO OOO! I HAD LUNCH ON TIME TOO! :D **backflips** whooooooooooooooooooooooooooohoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ^_^ And you know why I had it on time as well, 'cause I brought my own food, I had TIME to pack my own lunch, yeaaaaaa 8-) saved monayyyyyy todayyyy xD Feels like a boss* 

Oooooo and I also started speaking to myself :) Not the normal speak in where I talk to myself, share a joke or two and argue with myself, a different kind but more on that later. It's already after 9 and I'm not in bed because I just got home D: so, till next time :D 

Habits. Challenge, I think :/

I AM SO FREAKING LAZY DAMMIT!
So, a couple things to note before you continue reading. 
1. I'm writing this at midnight, I'm incredibly tired, came home awhile ago from an almost 4 hour rehearsal for a show. 
2. I'm just talking continuously, no backspacing of thoughts, and I type as I think.
3. There is no 3 :| lol fooled ya :P 

Here goes. 
I, am, so, bleh idk even. Maybe I should just make this random thoughts of a random girl part 3? :/ 
I feeling rel out of it tonight. I need to sleep. No wait, that's not what I came to blog about. Yes! Habits. 
I hate mines :/ I have good ones, and then I have not so good ones. I suffer with a disease called procrastination. It's pretty serious. For example, I should've made this blog post since the start of September, saying of course that I had to cancel my last challenge, the quadrilingualism one,(see post here http://everydemonwantshispoundofflesh.blogspot.com/2012/08/quadrilingualism-challenge.html ) because I got involved in so many different activities during the vacation. But nope, so to anyone who wanted to know how that went, I'm sorry :/ And also, I should've just been persistent with my blogging, and my vlogging! Havent made a video in over a month! wow that sucks :( Actually, I made about three, never edited and uploaded them however, seeeeeee, procrastination. Dammit! 
But ya know me, I want change, I put it in a challenge :) 

So, Let's call this, Habitual week? Or maybe month? It takes about 20 days of repetition for a habit to be formed or something Me thinks, so fine a Habitual month week. Oh goushhhh if I start with the amount of habits I need to cut I eh go finish now :/ lol ok I exaggerate it. hehehe Mr. Noodle *said in Elmo's voice* I do a really good Mr. Noodle xD ahhh my boob hurts :/ wait whattttt? *scrolls up* Something bout habits. Ah yes! Habitual Month it shall be!

So during the course of the month, I shall blog about the different habits I'm trying to change. Forgive me if they overwhelm you. lol And not just habits to replace, but things I want to make into habits. Sooooo, for those of you who enjoyed my 30 Day Do Something New Everyday Challenge from last year :) *Appreciate yall btw* ;) I hope yall enjoy this one! Stick around, try a thing or two :) It's always a good time ^_^ Fuh reals tho, I had heck of a lot of fun last year with that aforementioned (<<< take in that big word LOL) challenge. xD
Why I must type so ghetto? :/ Typing like how I does talk, pressah, lol

Ok I have class at 9am, and it takes about 1:15 minutes for me to travel, relatively comfortably to school :/ So Imma get to my bed now (lies, I'm probably gonna chat a bit, browse, sit around and stare then fall asleep without climbing on my bed, get up about 2am with neck pain then drag myself to my un-made-up bed and wake up late for school) heyyy, at least I'm honest with myself! I ain't fronting! humph. That's what this challenge is for. So stay tuned :)
And oh yea, check out my vlog if you'd like. Reading this unless you really know me of course, then you barely know how I talk and sound. So hopefully my vlog helps clear things up, well, whenever I post more random videos. OH MA GAWSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *holds face dramatically* I SHOULD HAVE A 30 DAY RANDOM VIDEO CHALLENGE! :O Nugging! *click* dudeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Awesome Idea! imma think about it :D Am I talking to myself right now? Geez shut up, steups, no, leave me alone :| okies I stop talk crazy now :|

Bai Bai Mr. Noodle ^_^ 

Quadrilingualism Challenge

So, I like languages. I'm not sure if it's a passion, but I do enjoy learning it, speaking it, confusing people with it and meeting people who actually speak it! But now that I'm out of Secondary school and moving onto a degree, one that may not necessarily be Spanish >_< well, hopefully, a minor at least, it's going to be tough to keep up with it, or even learn new ones. Partly because I'd be focused on other studies, and mainly because, I just wouldn't be focused on studying it, out of a classroom setting. So I'm bringing the classroom to home! 


I like 7 and 30 Day Challenges, But I guess, until the end of August? Or maybe till i start University(hopefully) oh gosh, * hyperventilates and panics at the thought that I may not get in D: * But no sooner than August is over, shall i complete this challenge :D Basically, I'm going to try learning 3 foreign languages simultaneously;i.e completing the same lessons such as Basic Greetings, grammar rules, descriptions, travel etc, each on the same day. And considering English is my first language, it will count as 4 in the end, thus making me a quadrilinguist, or polyglot. But, in addition to those, I'm going to widen my vocabulary. For now, I'll start with 5 new words per day, that I shall use in my day to day speech as practice, and just for the fun of it, attempt to learn and remember those same 5 new words, in each of the three foreign languages :D 
I can imagine some people saying, 'for the fun of it? what part of that sounds fun to you? o.O' lol but I like the challenge ^_^ 
And this is definitely going to be a challenge, considering I may be involved in other activities, whole day ones, that would greatly infringe on the time needed to study, but the important thing is that I try! 


Oh, and lastly, the foreign languages shall be:
Spanish
Already fluent in that, but CAPE really messed up my ability to learn basic stuff, it packed my brain with advanced topics like Global warming, tourism, globalization and technology, and got rid of the basic 'Hola' lol Ok I keed I keed hehe but I want to take my time and really develop my skills in it through continuous practice, soooo ya.


French
Did French up to form 3 in Secondary school, was never excellent at it,just average, but I blame that entirely on myself because I didn't focus or study it as often as I should've, but once I did, I was awesome at it! Too bad I dropped it like a breadfruit after that, lol 


And the last language, I'm gonna need suggestions. I was thinking Portugese, but ughhhhh it's so close to Spanish, well relatively, and I don't think I want to become incredibly fluent in that, or maybe, not yet. 
But I'm also thinking Mandarin, apparently more people in the world speak Mandarin than they do English :O 
And also Russian, considering it is one of the 6 Official Languages of the United Nations. That way, I'd know 4 of them, but If I do both Mandarin and Russian I'd know 5 :O I SHOULD LEARN 5 LANGUAGES!!! lol xD 
In case anyone was wondering, the last official one is Arabic.


5 Languages, hmmm *strokes imaginary beard* Quintilinguistic Lifa. I shall think about it. So Portugese, Mandarin or Russian? I shall ponder ^_^

So till tomorrow please God! 
See you later
Hasta Luego
A plus tard
Ate logo!


...Just looked up how to say see you later in Russian and Mandarin and my expression is o.O What are those things! lol
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That is all [Exeunt] ^_^

Please Listen

When I ask you to listen to me
and you start giving me advice,
you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why
I shouldn’t feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something
to solve my problem,
you have failed me,
strange as that may seem.

Listen! All I ask is that you listen.
Don’t talk or do – just hear me.

Advice is cheap; 20 cents will get
you both Dear Abby and Billy Graham
in the same newspaper.
And I can do for myself; I am not helpless.
Maybe discouraged and faltering,
but not helpless.

When you do something for me that I can
and need to do for myself,
you contribute to my fear and
inadequacy.

But when you accept as a simple fact
that I feel what I feel,
no matter how irrational,
then I can stop trying to convince
you and get about this business
of understanding what’s behind
this irrational feeling.

And when that’s clear, the answers are
obvious and I don’t need advice.
Irrational feelings make sense when
we understand what’s behind them.

Perhaps that’s why prayer works, sometimes,
for some people – because God is mute,
and he doesn’t give advice or try
to fix things.
God just listens and lets you work
it out for yourself.

So please listen, and just hear me.
And if you want to talk, wait a minute
for your turn – and I will listen to you. 

~Author Unknown~

Read this in Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul, and loved it. Such a sad reality that people can't do such a task as listening alone.They think they understand the meaning of the word, but it's far deeper than just 'hearing', much more perplex than sharing your view.  Just LISTEN. It sounds easy, simple, but yet, we still find a way to add to it, and take away from it. I don't need your advice, I just need you to listen. 

Challenge Update and Trip to the Dentist!

I'm so lazy :| gosh that's gotta stop! >.< 

Ok so my challenge finished since Saturday, and well it was successful ^_^ Ate meat the Saturday though, but success nonetheless :D I must say, going to bed early...er, is relatively tough but very rewarding! Bed between 11-12, NO LATER! and up by 8, you get a lot more out of the day! 

One thing is for sure, I missed meat!  and fried fish :D :D Don't think I'd be doing a vegan challenge anytime soon again.

Today, I went to the dentist! ^_^ His name is Mr. Agbontaen  [Ag-bun-tine] and he's from Nigeria! WE go way back(meaning he's been my dentist since I was like 11?] He's pretty cool too, I can guarantee I'd always smile when I'm there. He always changes my surname :s Lifa Marawaski! Princess Lifa, the best surgeon in the Caribbean! Lifa (Insert List of other cool African Names and Royalty here) lol ^_^ 

Today was kinda weird though, he came late and didn't react all smiley, and was somewhat forgetful. I guess something was bothering him :/ Either way, as soon as he changed my surname my heart smiled, LOL silly, but simple enough to make an impact. And according to him, I'm 'best patient' lol 

One thing for sure, there is NOOOO face uglier, than the one you have when a dentist is operating in your mouth o.O Thank Goodness I can't see it! lol And gosh that suction straw the assistant has in your mouth, today she really shoved it! But I wouldn't have noticed much to be suctioned anyways because half of my lower face was NUMB! 

Mocaine tastes weird :/

Injections hurt :( 

Literally felt the liquid going through the flesh surrounding my mandible during the injection D: 

Nigerians are cool :D 

Drilled tooth smells like a burning mosquito :/

The blue light they put in your mouth, idk what it is, but it requires eye protection, makes your mouth feel realllllyyyy funny! In a weird way funny, and kinda hurt my head, I wonder what it does :/ 

I LOVEEEEE gettin my teeth polished! ^_^ it's like a massage in your mouth ^_^ 

Fluoride treatment was apple flavored, delish! ^_^ 

My dentist gave me a toothbrush, toothpaste and dental floss! :D 

Okies, I think that's it with my Dentist trip soliloquy! 

Get checked up! every 6 months peeps :D 

and SMILEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE whilst you still have the teeth to do it :D 

Not sure what this challenge is, Challenge

Unknowing to me, tomorrow please God is the first of July O_O And there I was writing in work, 'call back on Monday 1st' haha faillll. I rarely ever know what day it is though :/ But that's not the point. Otherwise, it's great that it is, because I always like to start challenges on the 1st of a month ^_^ 


So I've postponed this for awhile now, tried it, probably lasted one day, meat was just so overwhelmingly delicious! This is originally meant to be a 'Vegetarian' Challenge. So no meat, just the good ole veggies and stuff. But I think I need to easeeee my way into that, and so it's a 'Semi-Vegetarian' Challenge. And the reason for that is primarily because, I really like cheese lol and Ryvita #Addicted >.< plus I need milk, and well, fish is awesome :/ okies, so basically it's like this.
No Chicken
No Beef
No other type of meat except fish
Some animal products such as eggs(haven't had eggs in months :O ) and milk :D 
The veggies I shall try to consume as raw as possible! 
And the fish shall not be cooked with any sort of oil. 


So I guess it's more of a health challenge? hmmm
Then I figured why not add a new spin to it, and have a 'Go to Bed at a Reasonable Hour and Not Spend the Entire Night Watching How I Met Your Mother or Gossip Girl or Pretty Little Liars or Any Other Sitcom That I Have on My Watch Sitcoms All Vacation List Plus Wake up Earlier Whilst Being a Semi- Vegetarian Challenge' ^_^ 

Watched Gossip Girl from 11:30- now today :| And basically finished 4 seasons of HIMYM already, would've finished a month ago o.O ^_^ 
And well, I sleep pretty late.really early and that's probably not a good thing unless I plan to work Night Jobs in the future :| 
So this should be interesting, and rewarding I hope :) 
So here's to hoping for success for the next 7 days ^_^ 

Soooooo I Got Robbed.

Well the title pretty much explains it all. So I'm not really sure where to go from here, thoughts so scattered :/

I always wonder and marvel at little changes, big ones too, but the little ones in particular. Like how, taking one taxi instead of the other just seconds away, could be the difference between life and death. Or how, staying back at home 2 minutes longer, or forgetting something and having to go back for it, could be the determinant of whether or not you may notice something, find something, understand something. And lastly, the impact. The impact the littlest things could have on you. Like seeing someone with a certain hairstyle, and your mind goes on into how awesome it may be, how confident they may be, then somehow reach to the point where it eats at your insecurities, makes you wonder why you can't be that yourself, bold and brave, and from then you make the decision to be better, become like this person who might as well be a figment of your imagination as for only a second you glimpsed then, or to wallow in self pity and regret, remorse for everything you've done and haven't done, inevitably leading to a downward spiral. How? from seeing someone's hairstyle? The little things. 

Quite frankly I'm not sure how I feel about this all yet, it fluctuates. No one really knows EXACTLY how they're respond in dangerous situations. Your conscious mind fathers information from your senses, daily experiences, impacting directly on your subconscious, or inner conscious level, causing you to think certain ways, and react different ways. It's sorta like a computer, storing all that information, making you either function smoothly, malfunction in certain areas, or even crash when these inner thoughts are brought to a conscious level. Point is, lol, who really knows EXACTLY what they'd do. 

So here I was, walking home, only to be attacked from behind by two guys. Now you see two guys coming behind you, maybe you get suspicious, but had I looked back, I wouldn't have. Why? Because I know one of them, literally from younger days, went to my primary school, coming to my house to pick five-finger off my tree, all ah dat! So in the actual robbery, I sat on the floor thinking, whilst still strugglin with my bag and them, really? you? you're one of the guys robbing me? REALLY? and then of course, oh no, my money, my bb,my ipod and the stuff I just bought for my graduation in like 2 hours! But, I let go the bag. I didn't know if they had a weapon, and quite frankly I didn't want to find out. Strangely, there was this little boy, no more than 11, just there, on a bike, watching. And when they decided they can't find my phone let's just snatch the bag and go,the little boy rides up to me and says 'Family, what happen?' Really? -_- So tiredly, I ran to the main street to see if anyone was in the road and could have stopped them, saw a neighbor and he called after them, but how much does that really do? Nonetheless, it was appreciated. So, in the blink of an eye, I lost pretty valuable things, think my ring got slid off too..my graduation ring :/
Well, a lotttttttttt more ensued after the event!. It's so mind blowing the amount of things that transpired in the last 24 hours O_O 

But, I am quite honestly not in the frame of mind to discuss that just yet. But now, I'm even more thankful. Worse things could have happened, but it didn't and I thank the Lord for it all. Despite me losing those stuff, those guys lost even more and will continue to lose more. And I pray for them and for better.

P.S I had a blastttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt at my graduation regardless!! I didn't care who bothered that I danced and skipped around with my friends allllllll night, I had just the right to be there, as anyone else, and I live for not a single one of them. But thank God for great friends to share it with! Shar, Lileh, Ma g Nadz, Kankan, Bridge, Pearly, Kimi times 2 and of course, my darling brother Damian :) I love you guys! ^_^